Dear B-rye

Today I was half-heartedly watching a daytime sitcom(for research purposes) and it struck me(as it has before and I assume has struck you at some point as well) that the laugh track inserted into comedies are so.......so......well, frankly I don't know what they are. I like to think the familiar spurt of laughing behind every sitcom joke isn't necessary, but then I wonder if I'd miss it if it happened to be absent.
The real reason I bring this up is to pose this question; Could these laugh tracks be utilized in other areas of our existence?
Here are a few ideas:
-every time after anyone anywhere farts
-a replacement for all the clapping during the State Of The Union addresses
-an alternative to the gross squishing sound of stepping on bugs
-upon opening an umbrella
-the immediate greeting upon entering Canada
-the sound that comes out whenever you're about to say something really stupid to a girl, then instead of her laughing at you when you say in your quasi-pubescent voice 'I think you smell pretty' you can impress her by blasting the sound of a live studio audience laughing in her face. Then she'd be sure to fall head over heels for you, and she wouldn't have her boyfriend beat you up like last time.

All in all B-rye, I wanted to mention this to you and my other avid reader for the purpose of saying the following; I don't think you need a laugh track to be funny, you're great just the way you are(especially if you fall down or do anything with Jim Belushi). I can think of a few people that I know that might benefit from one, but you, my friend, are so much better than that.